Goatview Farm - The Saint Report www.goatview.com

January 25
Plummeting Poultry

Celebrating a feast day today is Saint Dwywen, the patron saint of the broken-hearted, especially the Welsh broken-hearted. She may also be invoked to help sick animals.
Yesterday's story about the goat-toss reminded me of the old "WKRP in Cincinnati" episode about how, for a Thanksgiving promotion, the station decided it would be fun to throw a whole bunch of live turkeys out of a plane over a football field. Hundreds of happy families gathered below for the big event. Unfortunately, domestic turkeys don't fly any better alive than they do frozen: the hapless (but purely fictional) fowl dropped like boulders--or maybe more like big feathered water balloons, splatting nightmarishly on the ground below.

Less dramatic, far less well-publicized, but very real was the old Cordell, Oklahoma, Thanksgiving turkey drop. I found out about that bygone event on a webpage devoted to Cordell memories, among which was this:

BABY CHICKS AND JIGGS

In the spring one of the merchants I always enjoyed visiting was Jiggs. He sold chicken feed, blocks of salt for our cattle, and bought cream from the farmers. Spring time was the most interesting as Jiggs always had a good supply of newly hatched baby chicks. It was always fun for the children to stick their fingers in the little vent holes on the boxes in which the farmers carried the chickens home.

And now they expect computers and video games. What the heck has happened to kids, anyway?

Back to the topic...

TURKEYS AND MORE TURKEYS

The event that by far was the most exciting occurred in the fall of the year. It was when the local Chamber of Commerce tossed live turkeys, geese, and an occasionally guinea hen off the four story Court House into a throng of people that had gathered on the Court House lawn below. Everyone would come to town in hopes of catching a treat for Thanksgiving dinner.

Many times a large turkey would end up in two or three peoples hands at the same time. Two separate people would have a leg and one would have the neck and all would be hollering and claiming the turkey was theirs. Many hours were spent sitting around pot belly stoves analyzing how they just about caught a prize. But with age of politically correctness and animal rights this rather barbaric tradition was discontinued.

Aw, shucks.

Now, here is a newsy little bit from Yellville, Arkansas (yes there is such a place...the Saint Report does not lie). Incidentally, the web page that originally held this is now defunct.

"Yellville is famous for the Turkey Trot festival, held in October of each year. Here are some pictures I took in 1996. I have tried to get a picture of a turkey as it comes out of a plane, but couldn't with my old Agfa camera. (BTW, wild turkeys can fly, but not very well).

The National Enquirer ran an article some years ago about our "inhumane" treatment of wild turkeys, so the Chamber of Commerce agreed to stop allowing the "turkey drops", now the turkeys are still dropped, but it is unofficial :-) Turkey Trot was started in 1945 to reintroduce the wild turkey to Marion county, and with no government help, the wild turkey is now common in the a
rea."

Yeah. Who says you need big govmint. Arkansas, incidentally, has only 41 dentists per 100,000 population, which puts it at number 49 nationally. Coincidence?

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Saints o' the day include, but are not limited to, Dwyn, Praejectus, Ananias, and Poppo. Today is also the celebration of The Conversion of St. Paul.

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Edwin Newman, author of several brainy books on language, gets 89 candles on his birthday cake today (2008).

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Also born today was Robert Burns (1759-1796). If you feel like honoring his memory today, go put on something plaid and read May 23 - Haggis.

On to January 26
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Marilyn Jones 2001-2008